From cot to bed – what you NEED to know!

Cot to bed

I was so excited when it was time to transition my daughter from the cot to a bed. I researched it a lot. Well there were so many different styles of beds to choose from, was I going to keep the same theme in her room or change it? What linen did she need? What sort of mattress should I buy? Pillows? Do I get a couple of throw cushions too? Storage? Should I get matching drawers? Oh, so many questions, so much to consider, oh such fun!!

WHOA – HANG ON A SEC!

Yes, it is an exciting time when your little one is getting ready for a big bed, but is he really ready yet? Read this first to ensure a smooth transition for everyone.

When is the right time?

A big mistake you can make is to transition your child into a bed before he is ready. If you do move your child before he’s ready then often disaster will strike. You have a child battling bedtime and/or up all through the night. There is often a honeymoon period where your child goes to bed easily, sleeps through the night and you are all high fiving each other. After a few nights, weeks or months your child suddenly realises this new freedom and will happily explore his options.

I recommend

  • Ensure your child is a great sleeper in a cot before you move him to a bed. If not, the problems will just transfer to the bed and it will be harder to rectify.
  • Wait until your child is 2.5years MINIMUM but hold off to 3years if you possibly can. Children younger than this are unable to completely understand the rules around bedtime and it will take longer to reinforce this.

The Next Step…

So you have a champion sleeper and his 3rd birthday is on the horizon. Here are some tips to help with a smooth transition.

1) RULES –

Sleeping in a big bed is a massive change for a child. Being a ‘big kid’ comes with responsibilities.

Golden Rule #1 “You cannot come out of bed until morning.”

So when is morning? You can either purchase a sleep clock of some kind; or the rule can be modified to “You cannot come out of bed until I come and get you in the morning.” If you go with option 2 and decide to not use a sleep clock, you must set a specific “getting up time” and stick with it. You cannot expect your child to get up at 6am one morning then 7am the next and be happy about it. A child is more likely to get out of bed in the early hours of the morning.

Golden Rule #2 is “If you need me in the night, call and I will come to you.” Never allow your child to come out to you because the first time he does this, and he is rewarded with attention, you will give him a green light to do it all the time. You child may test you by calling out over and over again. Annoying, but normal. If this is the case, tell him that this is the last visit and you will see him in the morning. Ignore all other calls.

2) BOUNDARIES –

Have a very clear and predictable bedtime routine. This is the same regardless if your child is in a cot or a bed. Children like visual prompts such as a bedtime routine chart. Click here to download.

Teamwork is important too. Same rules applies regardless of which adult is in charge!

3) PREPARE YOUR CHILD –

Before the big event, allow your child to be part of the excitement. Talk about the big change that is about to happen. Maybe he can come bed shopping with you? Maybe he can choose between 2 types of duvet/doona cover or sheets. Possibly he can pick out a reading lamp. I would avoid making it a surprise just in case it backfires. Some children do not handle change well, so building up to the change may need to take a few weeks or even a month depending on the temperament of your child.

4) PREPARE YOURSELF –

So how are you going to react when your little one does get out of bed? Trust me, it will happen at some point so if you prepare yourself before it happens then things will run a lot smoother. Attention positive or negative is still attention, so stay calm. Remind him of the bedtime rules of staying in bed and walk him back to bed. Be consistent, be consistent, and be consistent! You may need to repeat this over and over again. Depending on your child, it may take time for him to understand that you really mean “stay in bed until morning.” Toddlers and children need to test boundaries. It is your job as the parent to demonstrate that the rules will not change.

5) MORNING TIME –

Keep morning time the same as when your child was in his cot. If you are using a sleep clock, if you do not stick with the set time (even if it’s a minute to go) you will open a huge can of worms. Your child will think it is fine to get out at other times during the night. I repeat – Consistency is key! .

I transitioned my baby at 18months of age and everything was fine. Your child will be fine too.

I hear this all-the-time. Many well-meaning friends will advise you to transition your child earlier than is recommended. Their child was fine so why shouldn’t yours? You will certainly here this advice if your child is having trouble sleeping. If you or your friend have managed to transfer a child earlier than 2.5years and were successful, I take my hat off and say, “Wow you won the lottery there. Awesome and good for you!”

To read about the 5 most common reasons parents will transition their child from a cot to a bed earlier, click here.

My biggest piece of advice I can give you – don’t be persuaded to transition your child from a cot to a bed before your child is ready. I have had many people raise their eyebrows in horror when I say that 3years is the most ideal age to move to a bed. If you can wait it out, prepare your child, prepare yourself before you go for it – you will be much better off in the long run.

One final thought – sometimes things don’t go to plan. There will be some children no matter what foundations are laid will quite frankly rebel. Though disheartening, there are things that can be done to enable children to stay in their bed all night. If this is you, then it may be time to get a professional on hand. Contact me here to book in a time to chat.

Good luck with the transition! It can be a little daunting at first as change is hard on everyone. Remember this is an exciting time too. Enjoy it! I followed this exact advice and we have never had a nighttime visit. My daughter is now 6.

Sleep well,

Child Sleep Consultant for Sleepytime
Child Sleep Consultant for Sleepytime

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Do you want to read more about children and sleep? Here are other posts you may be interested in.

Teach your child about the importance of sleep here

Toddler climbing out of the cot? Read here

Does your child have separation anxiety? Read here

Do you want to reduce the battle at bedtime? Read here

Are you about to embark on toilet training? Read how it can affect sleep here

Do you think your child is ready to drop their nap? Read more here

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