Tag Archives: tired signs

Can you sleep train a newborn?

July 18, 2016 Janelle Leave a comment

Parents often want to know when they can begin establishing healthy sleep habits. It really does pose the question – can you sleep train a newborn? So, you understand the importance of sleep but there is this “fear” that you will create really bad sleep habits for your baby. What should you do?

Firstly I want to clearly state my position regarding sleep training a newborn… I believe you cannot “sleep train” a newborn baby. After 12weeks, there are different techniques and methods more suited for younger babies you can begin to try if you are finding sleep difficult. Science dictates that the sleep cycle of a newborn differs greatly from the sleep cycle of a baby over 6months of age.

So what does this mean? You cannot do anything until 6months? No, in fact you can do lots of things in the interim to help your baby BEGIN to establish healthy sleep habits. Here are some things you can do from the moment you arrive home from the hospital.

1) Establish a bedtime routine.

Yep, starting a defined bedtime routine gives you and your baby a clear line between nighttime and daytime sleep. Incorporating a bath, a massage, a book or song before bed will become an important ‘sleep cue.’

2) Establish “good feeding.”

Make sure your baby is feeding properly. Is your baby latching correctly? Many babies are born with upper/lower lip-ties that make feeding difficult. A hungry baby will not sleep! If your baby has reflux, you may need to offer smaller feeds more often to prevent over-feeding causing discomfort. See a lactation consultant if you are finding feeding difficult.

3) Positive Sleep Environment.

When at home, try your best to allow your baby to sleep in a quiet room, in a bassinet or cot. This will encourage a better daytime sleep and it will help with nighttime sleeping too. If your baby is always in the sling napping during the day, it will be harder for them to sleep without it at night.

4) Understand your baby’s tired signs.

Newborns can roughly stay awake for about 45mins at a time. This means that by the time your baby has woken; you need to change the nappy, feed, burp and bond all in 45mins. It isn’t long before your baby is ready to sleep again. Really watch the clock AND your baby’s tired signs. An overtired baby will need a lot of ‘help’ to fall asleep or your baby may catnap instead.

5) Helping your baby to fall asleep.

Some babies need a lot of help to fall asleep, some babies need no help at all. Rocking, patting, cuddling to sleep are all great tools for newborns. There are no set rules around newborn sleep but keep in the forefront of your mind that as each week clocks on, you want to help your baby less and less to fall asleep initially and less help to resettle.

Having a newborn baby in the house can be stressful and demanding – but it is also such a special time that goes by far too quickly. This time is about bonding, feeding and sleeping for everyone involved!

To read more about newborn sleep, click here

Sleep Well,

Janelle Jeffery Child Sleep Consultant for Sleepytime — Janelle Jeffery
Child Sleep Consultant for Sleepytime

Child Behaviour, Child Sleep, Parenting, Sleep Training Methods, Toddler Sleep

Why I’m teaching my daughter about sleep

May 19, 2016 Janelle Leave a comment

Being a child sleep consultant there is a lot of talk at the dinner table around what I do, so you would be right to think that my daughter Emily is and has always been, a perfect sleeper. Well that just isn’t the case.

In fact I still have this image burnt in my brain of Emily (3 at the time) standing in the bathroom half undressed, tantrum in full swing, and me on my bed crying having a time out. I hated the lead up to bedtime, and so did she. Every night the battle was on. We were both left with wounds even though the end result was her finally falling asleep. No one walked away a winner.

It was getting so horrendous that after dinner, I would pounce on her kicking and screaming (that was both of us!!) whilst trying to navigate the stairs to the bathroom to rip the clothes off her tiny body. Boy she was strong. I would talk to Emily through gritted teeth and basically threaten her that I would send her to bed without a story or a kiss or even pyjamas. She would need to sleep naked! Bedtime was a punishment for both of us.

Hindsight and knowledge are wonderful things because once we finally passed that phase (not quite sure how I did it to be honest as there was a lot of wine consumed during that period) I realised that I needed to teach my daughter about sleep. Sleep should not be a punishment but a lovely reward after a busy day. I looked at sleep that way so why couldn’t she?

How to teach your child about sleep

#1 Tired signs

If your child is getting ratty, being naughty or is having a tantrum AND it is close to a sleep time, tell him “your body is telling me that you are getting tired. I get frustrated/angry/upset/etc when I am tired too.” No child likes to hear, “you are tired.” By commenting on what his body is telling him, takes it away from being a personal attack. It is not his fault he is behaving that way – he’s tired. By telling him that you feel like that too helps him understand that it is normal. This also enables him to begin to recognise the signs of being tired. I love it when Emily says to me “I am tired mummy, I think I need to go to bed.”

#2 No surprises

The element of surprise will only backfire at bedtime. Imagine you are watching your favourite show and your partner switches off the TV and sends you to bed. You would be mighty angry! Children need to be warned that playtime is at an end and bedtime is approaching. Set a timer for 5minutes and once it’s time, playtime is done.

Stick to the same bedtime routine each and every night. A bedtime routine’s job is to send a message to our body that is it time for sleep. If there is no consistent routine, then your child is missing out on that vital sleep cue.

#3 Communication

Talk through the bedtime routine. Some children need step-by-step guidance. These can be one word prompts like “toilet, clothes off, bath, teeth, pyjamas, etc.” There is a lot of research out there stating boys process information differently to girls. If you overload your son with long, wordy instructions, you are likely to hit resistance. Less talk more action applies here. You can download a visual bedtime chart here or make your own.

Explain to your child (not when they are having a meltdown!) why sleep is so important. Make it simple and explain it in a way that is age appropriate.

Sleep is Awesome because…

Sleep makes our hearts happy.
Sleeps helps us to grow.
Sleep helps our body to fight germs.
Sleep helps us to balance and not fall over.
Sleep gives our brain power to think.
Sleep gives us energy to play and have fun.

#4 Punishment

As soon as you make bedtime a punishment, you are always going to be faced with a battle. Sending a child to bed after explaining they are showing their “tired signs” is one thing, but sending them to bed for hurting their sister is the wrong message you want to be giving. If you do need to offer a “timeout” I would recommend using a different room in the house.

So, in a nutshell…

Change your mindset around sleep.
Teach your child about tired signs.
Teach your child about the benefits of sleep.
Follow a consistent bedtime routine. (Download chart)
Contact me here for a professional, holistic approach to change bedtime battles at your house.

Baby Sleep, Child Sleep, Toddler Sleep

6 Daylight Saving Sleep Tips!

September 29, 2015 Janelle Leave a comment

Many of you twice year need to prepare yourselves for daylight savings. As an adult this can be hard enough, but trying to tackle it with a child’s sleep schedule to consider and be a nightmare!! Here are some quick tips to help with the transition…

Daylight Savings

For a gentle approach, adjust the time by 10-30minute increments every 3 days. Depending on your child’s ability to stay awake without becoming too overtired will determine the speed at which you make the change. Every child is different so you need to watch and observe. This gentle time change applies at the beginning and end of daylight savings.
If you are brave, change to the new time immediately but this can cause overtiredness. For a little while you child might protest at sleep time or cat nap. Hang in there and don’t panic. The more you try to “fix” things, the more problems you could create.
Watch for tired signs especially at night. An overtired child will have difficulty falling asleep and staying asleep. Due to the change in sleep schedule, your child may experience night wakings for a short period too. Again, don’t panic! Let things rectify on their own.
Be patient. Change takes time. It may take up to a month for your child’s body to fully adjust.
Early morning wake ups. Try really hard to keep your little one in bed until a reasonable wake up time. These wake ups may be the most difficult so hang in there, it will get better.
Use light and darkness to your advantage. Use lots of sunlight and fresh air to stay awake, use darkness to get to sleep.

The biggest thing to avoid for yourself and for you child is to constantly refer to the “old time”. The quicker you move to the new time the better it will be for all of you.

Help your child to love sleep